It could be the new haircut.
Okay, it probably isn't the new haircut...that helped my mental state though!
My old hairdo was in the process of growing out.
It left me feeling what I call "mom-i-fied".
As in, I have nothing else going on in my life but being a mom and don't I look like it.
I am not hip and cool, never have been...but I am for sure not mom-i-fied.
So, since I was feeling poorly I asked Shelby if she would take a picture with me for the blog.
She wasn't thrilled about it, but did want to make an appearance and be known as something other than "that dog who looks like Yoda".
So I handed the camera to my 9 year old and got a huge variety of very bad photos!
Here is the least worrisome of the lot.
It is cut into a cute little stack in the back and tapers gently to the front.
My new orangish hair color doesn't look quite as strange I think.
This morning when I logged onto Facebook, I noticed that one of my friends had checked that they liked this photo.
I put that photo online back in March.
I can remember thinking...
This is why I write a blog.
I know that may seem random and strange to you, but I just had so much I wanted to say about this photo at the time, and so many other things, but felt limited by the constraints of facebook.
Here is what I want to say today. It is really about so much more than the bee!
My God designed and made that bee.
That design is so very amazing, beyond understanding...fantastic!!
It helps to prove that God is real.
He is who He says He is!
It gives substance to His commands for us.
The writer of Romans puts it like this in chapter 1 verse 20.
"For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse "
That same God who made that bee for me to understand his supremacy is the master and creator of all that I believe and understand.
It is becoming more and more clear to me that acknowledging His supremacy is a very very important part of my life and walk.
When we don't give Him thanks and acknowledge Him we are headed down a slippery slope of humanness and..."we profess to be wise but become fools, whose hearts become darkened".
check out verse 28 of the same chapter.
"And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper."
and continuing in verse 32 after a long list of improper things...
"and although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them."
So, I guess my point here is....
God gave us plenty of evidence of his majesty.
He gave us plenty of reason to praise Him and tell of His greatness.
He asks us to be thankful and honoring of Him.
I am learning that doing this consistently and heartily draws me closer to God.
Closer to his commands and principles.
Closer to His presence.
I don't want to be put in a position of not acknowledging Him and Him being so disappointed in me that he gives me over to do improper things. I really, really even want to stay away from giving hearty (or even lackadaisical) approval to such things.
There are certainly things God calls sin, which I do not give approval to.
To do that, for me would be to deny God.
I cannot do it.
If put in a position of asking me to do that...I sincerely desire that I will learn to consistently not choose that route. If my heart is softened toward sin, doesn't it mean it is on its way to being hardened toward God.
Choosing to gloss over willful sinful behavior draws me away from God, even as sin draws the sinner away.
As I write this I understand that I am likely to be misunderstood, mainly because there is a strong sadness in my heart which I cannot share here,
and that I again see that I have so much growing yet to do in my walk with God.
But, ya know what???
Though you may not know it or see it.
I am walking.
Some days it is a slow plod, other days I feel as though my feet can't possibly catch up with my heart.
My heart which through the struggles and misunderstandings of life, longs to be completely His.
My heart which aches when trying so hard to do what is right in the sight of the Lord... but which also seems foolish to man.
Here, this verse gives me courage...
2 Chronicles 16:9
For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His.
Poor you!
You came and got stuck in the middle of my own mental arguments and anguish today.
No peanut butter cookies or anything.
Sorry, sometimes when a topic is on my heart I gotta get it off, or go crazy in the meantime.
Let's do this. Lets...
go for a walk.
A God walk.
Walk everyday.
Let the eyes of the Lord find you seeking to give your heart completely to Him...
as you are walking.
And, lets also eat cookies.
Lots of cookies.
I need to go make some cookies.
